Inside Amy Schumer – Sext Photographer – Uncensored

♪ ♪ Somebody’s really
pretty today ♪ ♪ Somebody’s
really pretty today ♪ ( phone text beeping ) ( shutter clicking ) Ugh. ( shutter clicking ) God. ( shutter clicking ) ( shutter clicks ) Ooh, ooh. ( phone ringing ) Jess?( Jess )
What’s wrong?
Okay, Bobby just text me, he wants me to send him, like,
a sexy picture.Oh my God, did you?No, no, I’ve been trying and they’re just,
like, really bad. Should I just
send him that one where– Remember I met Hillary Clinton
at LaGuardia? Should I
send him that one? You can, like, basically see
my nipple. They made me take it off
Facebook, so it’s
definitely not not sexual.You’re taking them yourself?Yeah… Wait, what?Honey, let me call
my guy.

Your guy? ( phone text beeping ) Oh, that’s Bobby again.Okay, I’m calling Danny P.
right now.
Danny P.? ( knocking ) Hi, come on in. Hi, thank you. Cute place. Do you teach art
to cats? Can I
offer you something? Offer me what? Half a coconut water
and the dirt from your Brita? I think I’m actually good,
lonelybones, I’m kind of in a rush. What do you got already,
let’s see. Ooh. Why the cactus? That’s not a–
that’s not a cactus. Okay, we need the bush
team on standby, it looks like
she’s got a Hasidic rabbi living in her underpants. No offense. Okay. We’re just gonna clean you up,
it’ll take a second. 20 minutes. Don’t worry, you’re in good
hands, okay? I’ve done everyone’s. I’m talking Blake Lively,
Scarlett Jo, George Lopez. It was actually my idea to make
Brett Favre’s dick, like, bright yellow. No, that was you? That was me. Let’s get to it. Did you
wear that yesterday? Yes! Very good, but don’t forget
your duck mouth, don’t forget
that duck mouth. Now you’re in a boat. You’re in a boat because
you’re Pocahontas and it’s the new world! Maybe less feathers. Smile like you don’t
have Spanx on. Yeah! Lay back
and look really alluring. Well, actually, don’t
look dead. You’re pregnant! You’re pregnant with
gift cards ! Yeah! Oh– Are you
gonna shit your pants? Oh my God, are you gonna
shit your pants? You’re so comfy. Too comfy. Too comfy. Look, if you don’t watch your
fucking shadow, I will remove it. Here we go. Yes! You’ve got a secret and only the
pillow can know. Wash yourself. Wash your whole body and your
armpits and under your boobs. Amy! Oh no, there’s a spider
in your hair! There’s a spider
in your hair! No! There’s a spider in your hair,
get it out! Yes! We have our shot,
that’s a wrap. You were amazing. Yoko! Unplug everything, we’re gonna
burn this rat’s nest down. You were so great. I’d love to stay and chat, but
I’ve got to run downtown. I have to shoot Diane Keaton
bottomless with a turtleneck like an hour ago, I’m sure you
understand. Oh my God, I just don’t
know how to thank you. Just get fucked. Bonsoir. ( phone sending tone ) ( phone alert )

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